… much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked." ~ Gilbert Gottfried

I'm giving online dating another try. So here's the profile I came up with.

About Me

The first thing people usually notice about me is my smile. And then I open my mouth and spew forth hilarity. My laugh has also been described as being as infectious as the stomach flu, which if you've ever worked in a small office or lived under the same roof with a bunch of people who have the stomach flu, you know it's not a matter of IF you get it, but when. Which leads us back to my sense of humor… it's not a matter of IF you'll get it, but when. It's really just one big circuitous cycle.

A little about me…. I love books, all kinds. I have shelves of cookbooks, novels, biographies, a slightly obsessive amount of books about the Kennedys, wine, books about writing books, the list goes on and on. I'm a very verbal creature in the sense that words, not visuals, really do it for me so if you have poor grammar and can't write a complete sentence, no offense to you but it's not going to work. Sending me the message "U R hott!" isn't going to work me into a frenzy, though I'm sure you're a great guy. For someone else.

My cookbooks are stained and splattered, illustrating that they're not just for show. My pot roast carbonnade cuts like butter and my homemade garlic mayo on grilled tuna steak is out of this world. I haven't quite perfected my lemon raspberry squares or cheesecake recipes just yet, they usually end up with a crack or two running through them, but they taste amazing all the same. Just ask my family and friends.

I'm generous to a fault, have a problem saying the word no, and have a compulsive shopping habit. Currently my shopping habits are trending towards skirts, dresses and ballet flats, though I'm also on the look out for some madras plaid shorts. So if you see any, please don't hesitate to let me know.

I enjoy wandering through art museums just as much as I like being a bleacher creature at Comerica Park. And as much as I enjoy staying in big city hotels, I'm a happy camper out in the woods. My music tastes run the gambit from Bach to Sinatra to Social Distortion to Miles Davis and with the exception of Simon and Garfunkle, there's not much I don't like.

As for you, I'd really (really really) appreciate if you practice good hygiene. Showering on a regular basis and freshly laundered clothes go a long way with me, perhaps even more than your grammar knowledge. You're relatively drama free, are kind to small children and animals, and are just as comfortable curling up on the couch for an all day Godfather marathon as going out and about and exploring what's out there. Oh, and you MUST enjoy kissing. Not just as a perfunctory duty, but because you honestly enjoy it.

First Date

One that you're looking forward to so much that you shower would be nice. I once had a first (and consequently last) date where the guy didn't shower after going to the gym two hours beforehand.

Okay, seriously. Coffee? Cliched. A drink? Well, kinda cliched but at least it's more adult-like. How about doing something where we can get to know each other? Root for the Tigers or wander through a museum, grabbing some grub at Slow's and poking around Corktown. ANYthing that's not cliched, please. 🙂

As for pics,  I used my Mo Livin' Large pic (feathery witch hat) and the one included here.

Thoughts? Suggestions? Single guys you'd like to introduce me to?;)